Speech (Part One)

"I gotta do this speech 'cause Wren's backed out, and I'm fucking fucked. I wrote some stuff but it makes me cry when I read it. I'm a groomsman and I'm fucking fucked."

I think I said that sentence to about a hundred people before Caleb's wedding. I, of course, did that instead of working on a new speech. That's one of my little tricks.

The day before after about 10oz of courage I read some pieces of it to Mairi, she said it sounded pretty good. The day of the wedding I get up and try to read it to Sarah.

I couldn't say one word. Frozen with my mouth open, in some deep internal struggle and losing. I could not will my words through that thick complex membrane of emotion. All I could do open my mouth and blink.

"Baby, we got a problem."

Enter the Distractions.

Number One:
(BRRRRINGGG!)
"Hello?"
"yeah, yup.. ok. ok. rob is... rob can... we will... ok we got it. no problem."
(click)
"That was Caleb's mom. she's in a panic, we have to help set up the reception."

Number Two.
"I have to get my hair cut!"
(Don't get my haircut but I waste some time walking about and thinking about it.)

Number Three.
"We have to get a Card!"

Number Four.
"Caleb!"
"Pif!"
"Your getting married today!"
"Your right."
"I'm freaking out about this speech thing and I was think I would just read that story I wrote about the right."
"Whatever you say or read I will be grateful..."
"shucks"
"You think that's bad I have to blow this Couch Shell during the ceremony! Look at this Mother! I'm scared shittless. just listen...Bruuuuuuuuuung!"
"wow."

Number Five.
"I need to seperate the Quarters from the other change in the penny jar! It's Clearly gone TOO FAR!"


Today's Song of the Day is "Caprice No.16 in G minor" performed by Itzhak Perlman, Composed by Niccolò Paganini, first published in 1817.

Crazy Fact: This was the sound in my head. It is the very sound of Panic.

njoy