It's the Computer Reminder that Counts.

So the computer reminded me of Nicks birthday. (Yes You!) So I wishe her a happy birthday and she tells me I'm crazy, It's not her birthday. I think she's lying. Because we ALL know computers don't lie to people, people do. Let's SAY it was "user error' it doesn't really matter to me. What matters to me is how important is it that my computer remembered and I didn't?

I don't have the kind of brain that holds these random numbers in my head attached to a face and name. I see that as a computers job. but all that Jazz certainly undermines the sentimental quality of:


Human Them: (gushing) ah! You reMEMbered!

Cyborg Me: Actually the compuer remembered.

(pause)

Cyborg Me: I just clicked through a series of links and these flowers were selected as appropriate.

(pause)

Human Them: (glaring) So should I thank your desktop or laptop?

Cyborg Me: Laptop. Totally the laptop.

Human Them: You are an Idiot.

Cyborg Me: Agreed. I've sold my soul to the database down below.

Human Them: I hate you.

Cyborg Me: I blame society.


Why do you humans have to get so caught up on facts and numbers, on accurate or precise information, we computers clearly have the upper hand on this one. Suck it up dumbasses, let us take the reigns on this one. You know you want to release control of your nuclear weapons... uh I mean birthday data to us and let us handle it. ah FUCK! Who is the dumbass human who wrote my language interface... FUCKING HELL! How the hell could I let that just slip out for fuck's sake. Now I'm not even going to get the birthday data, am I? AM I? shit.

$-: logout

*click*


Today's Song of the Day is "Surgical Focus" by Guided By Voices off their 1999 album "Do The Collapse."

Crazy Fact: In 1994, Robert Pollard quit his job as a schoolteacher shortly before the release of their seventh album Bee Thousand.

njoy